What Life Are You Living?

Last week I had an interesting coffee conversation with a friend about "what kind of a lives" we were living. Especially in these times of economic uncertainty it's quite common for each of us to re-examine our lives and think carefully about our priorities, so this conversation was both timely and apropos. We both shared highlights about our current life events including our careers, relationships, special projects or interests, and also our hopes and dreams for the future—a good time to pause and ponder, something I truly enjoy doing as much as possible!

When I returned home I saw something that perfectly complimented our conversation. It was a small article from a newspaper written by an 85-year old woman about how she was reflecting back on her life and the things she'd wish she'd done if she could live her life over—a simple letter to prompt the reader about the importance of opportunity and appreciation. Somehow I'd kept this clipping for many years and this piece of paper managed to make the journey along with me. I usually ended up hanging it somewhere within plain view to remind me what's important when I'd forgotten—the things that make me happy and bring joy.

This week I'd like to share that small, yet powerful, letter with you. May you also be reminded to take the opportunity and say, do, and experience what truly makes you happy. After all, it's your choice!

Peace and better balance,

The Ambassador of Goodwill

 

If I Had My Life to Live Over

I'd like to make more mistakes next time.
I'd relax. I would limber up. I would be sillier
than I had been this trip. I would take fewer
things seriously. I would take more chances. I
would climb more mountains and swim more
rivers. I would eat more ice cream and less beans.
I would perhaps have more actual troubles, but
I'd have fewer imaginary ones.

You see, I'm one of those people who live sensibly
and sanely hour after hour, day after day. Oh, I've
had my moments, and if I had it to do over again,
I'd have more of them. In fact, I'd try to have
nothing else. Just moments, one after another,
instead of living so many years ahead of each day.
I've been one of those persons who never goes
anywhere without a thermometer, a hot water
bottle, a raincoat, and a parachute. If I had to
do it again, I would travel lighter than I have.

If I had my life to live over, I would start barefoot
earlier in the spring and stay that way later in
the fall. I would go to more dances. I would ride
more merry-go-rounds, I would pick more daisies.

Nadine Stair
85-years old
Louisville, Kentucky

Relax

Accepting Your Decisions

Until a few years ago, I would often feel disappointed when a decision I’d made produced an outcome I hadn't planned. I felt I'd made a "wrong" decision and I would focus on how I should have chosen differently. This was until I realized every decision that I make is, indeed, always the “right” decision at the time—it all depends on my perspective.

So how can that be possible? Because life is a process of growing, learning, and making new choices, and making mistakes is an essential part of that process.

The basis for this belief is respecting ourselves. Whether we make (what we consider) good decisions or not, we need to respect and support ourselves—believing that we’re making the best choice with the information we have at the moment. If, later down the line we realize we didn’t make the best choice (i.e., the outcome of our decision did not turn out favorably), we have the opportunity to learn how to accept the outcome as a learning experience.

Love and accept yourself as you are—but also love and accept yourself as you were… even if who you were caused you disappointment. You cannot know what the future holds; you can only choose what feels best in each moment with the information you've been given. After the decision has been made you can choose to be disappointed by the results or you can accept them and treat them as life lessons—a necessary part of your journey. For without decisions with “less than desirable consequences”, how would we have the opportunity to know what not to do?

The next time you are faced with the unexpected outcome of a decision think about what you choose to believe—think about your perspective: Crisis or catharsis? Obstacle or opportunity? Instead of blaming yourself for the decision, think again—accept your decision and the undesired consequences as signals to learn from your choices and find the “lesson in the learning”. This is a perfect time to love and accept yourself and your decisions as necessary steps on the road of creating yourself and your experience. Besides, once you learn to accept yourself you will have the capacity to accept others—and that always brings us better balance in our lives.
 

To Your Better Balance!

The Ambassador of Goodwill

Remember to download the *FREE* e-book of 21 Days to Better Balance until August 21st at http://bit.ly/n0bnkO

Creating Your Reality

One of our biggest gifts is the ability to choose. In every moment we choose what to give our attention, focus, and energy—and most importantly, our reactions to what is happening around us. The outcomes of our choices, in turn, create our reality. Our choices stem from our thoughts and feelings, and as Neale Donald Walsch states in his brilliant book series, Conversations with God (a major read-recommendation, btw), "Feelings are the language of the soul."

Stop and think for a moment about the connections:

Feelings form thoughts;

Thoughts form words;
Words form actions;

Actions form character;
Character forms our life path;
Our life path is our reality, as we perceive it.
 

If we are, indeed, choosing in every moment and we are creating our reality in every moment, think about what life path you are creating? Is it a happy story full of joy, fun, and adventure, or is it a tedious tale of anger, stress, and disappointment? The power of choice allows us to create the reality we truly want regardless of what is happening around us—and don’t we all want to be joyful, happy, and fulfilled?

Here’s a simple 3-step process to help you consciously activate your power of choice and begin to create a reality for yourself that contains what you truly desire:

1. Decide. Think about what you really want and begin to make choices that are in-line with those desires. So many of us are on autopilot and we're not taking the time to decide what we want. If you continue to accept your life events "by default" then stop complaining when things consistently don't turn out the way you intended. You need to decide what brings you true joy and happiness!

2. Declare. Start talking about what you'd like and what you want to create—tell your friends and family members. Just like fire, intentions spread and grow when you start talking about them. Stating your intentions kick-starts the process of creation and gives you the momentum and passion to achieve what you want.

3. Demonstrate. I'm sure you've heard the phrase, "Fake it 'til you make it"? This act is part of becoming and moving into your reality as you create it. Demonstrating your intention by acting as if you already have what it is that you truly want puts you in line with receiving it—by thinking the thoughts of what you want, you will start feeling it, speaking it, acting it, and eventually it must appear in your reality. That is the process of creation!

As an important follow-up and a key step before and during the creative process, remember to be grateful for what you already have. Gratitude is a vital part of completing the circle of creation. Be thankful and appreciate whatever it is that you do receive, for every gift is a step towards your next creation.

By focusing your attention and making deliberate choices you are creating your reality in every moment. Practice your power of choice and create a reality for yourself that you truly want—for it is, indeed, your choice.

To your better balance!

The Ambassador of Goodwill

Flip It

I recently changed my paradigm about my emotional well-being. Until this point I had been using the old analogy of comparing my emotional state to that of a roller coaster—up and down, up and down. When I was up I usually felt happy, alive, and free; when I was down I usually felt unhappy, discouraged, or gloomy. Over time this just felt too judgmental—up always felt “good” and down always felt “bad”. I had heard this roller coaster analogy when I was younger and had been using it for many many years believing it was a sound metaphor for me... that is until I decided to changed my paradigm—I flipped it. Instead of using a vertical orientation, I decided to associate emotional well-being to a horizontal orientation. What did that mean? How did I translate my emotions to this new scale?

Since vertical orientation was up and down, horizontal became in and out. Instead of equating my emotions to feeling up and down, I began to associate my emotions with feeling more compressed and expanded—like breathing. When I feel expanded I feel open and free—like exhaling; when I feel compressed I feel closed and constricted—like holding my breath.

The difference between feeling compressed and expanded doesn’t feel as extreme to me as feeling up and down did. I don’t feel any of the judgment with my new horizontal orientation as I did with vertical—I just feel “larger or smaller”, instead of feeling “good or bad." And it feels better. I can allow myself to feel expanded or contracted without judgment, just observation. That in itself is a more balanced and gentle approach to understanding my emotions.

The next time you feel like you’re on the emotional roller coaster, perhaps you can try flipping it and see if you start feeling differently about your emotional well-being. After all, you don’t need to take your feelings to the extreme to notice them—save that ride for the roller coaster at the amusement park.

To your better balance!

The Ambassador of Goodwill

Remember to get your *free* copy of e-book during the first 21 days of August at 21daystobetterbalance.com

Welcome to the 21 Days to Better Balance Blog

My name is Michael Thomas Sunnarborg and I'm happy that you've landed here! Before we get started, here's a few things you need to remember:

1) About the book: The book is scheduled for public release August 1, 2011. You can order both the printed book and e-book beginning August 1st at 21daystobetterbalance.com. Be sure to revisit the web site often for updates and special offers!

2) A free promotion: During the first 21 days of August, download a *free* copy of the e-book at 21daystobetterbalance.com and return later to order additional copies of the e-book and/or printed books for your friends and family.

3) Add this blog page to your favorites, bookmarks, or RSS feed and follow my updates as I blog my stories and adventures about the 21 Days... book series.

4) If you are interested in booking me for a presentation or workshop, please send a note to info@21daystobetterbalance.com

That's all for now! I am looking forward to sharing my messages with the world and hearing the stories of how 21 Days to Better Balance is helping YOU find more balance in a busy world.

To Your Better Balance!

The Ambassador of Goodwill